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14 October 2003

Man in a box

While we're on the subject of David Blaine (can you feel the magic?), to date we've had the following performance art:

I. Buried Alive
II. Frozen in Time
III. Vertigo
IV. Above the Below

What do these things have in common? Well, he doesn't actually do very much in any of them! And, unless watching someone piss through a tube is your idea of fun, none of it is particularly entertaining.

It's patently obvious that there's going to be a fifth stunt, followed by a grand finale performance, details of which are magically contained in the letters of the man's name. So, don't be surprised when, in another fit of self-aggrandising publicity, he announces:

Bland idea VI

Current thinking indicates that this final stunt will miraculously involve even less movement than his previous performances as David attempts to bring the story of Rip Van Winkle to life by sleeping solidly for 20 years, without the use of a safety net.

Naturally, full 24 x 7 coverage will be available on all the usual Pay Per View channels with full interactivity along the lines of, "Press the RED button to perform a urine analysis on David's last liquid excretory product, or the BLUE button to listen to David snore."

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