Rage Cookies

More courtesy of Jessica Zafra (she's very good!):

Rage Cookies

Ingredients:

10 kilos of all the resentment you've ever felt but never expressed towards your parents, grandparents, elder relatives, teachers, government officials, office superiors, role models, and authority figures who have betrayed you, lied to you, or failed to follow their own grand pronouncements, and in doing so destroyed your faith in the human race.

10 kilos of all the bitterness you've ever felt towards the people you were in love with who didn't love you back, who mocked you, toyed with your emotions, abandoned you on the darkest nights of your soul, and never appreciated your willingness to tear your guts at their bidding, and in doing so obliterated your belief in real love.

10 kilos of all the revulsion you feel towards a society that worships mediocrity, that rewards phoniness and cheap sentimentality because it appeals to the lowest common denominator, that eats its young and pukes them out, that condones corruption and greed, and scoffs at honesty and ethical behavior because No one gets rich being honest and ethical, and in doing so destroys itself.

10 liters bile

1 cup vinegar

Directions:

Throw everything into a large vat and mix thoroughly to form a batter. Knead the batter with your bare hands. Beat merciliessly until it is soft. Make dozens of fist-sized lumps, then shape then into the people you despise.

Bake in 2000 degrees of anger.

Excerpted from "Planet of the Twisted" - Jessica Zafra. Published by Anvil Publishing Inc.